Bisexual healing

Quench takes a look at the significance of the Bisexual and ponders its validity as a sexuality

A person, who is sexually attracted to both sexes, is the dictionary definition of the word Bisexual.

However, the connotations attached to the term can often create certain assumptions about a person who defines him or herself as bi. Porn has taught us that bisexual women are nymphomaniac sluts, eager to please both sexes, usually both at the same time. People also often say that bisexuals are ‘lucky’ in a way, but often the prejudices that we experience from both sides of the sexuality spectrum mean that it’s not a simple case of getting twice the action.

Originally on my Gaydar Girls profile my status was set to bisexual, gaining only limited interest from the ladies using the site. 90% of messages I received were from ‘randy’ couples propositioning threesomes in order to satisfy the girlfriends’ curiosity (and 100% of cases, the boyfriend was as ugly as a hatful of arseholes). However, keeping everything else on my profile the same, I changed my status to ‘gay’. Instantly I received several messages from lesbians wanting to chat with me, suggesting that previously I was skimmed over as irrelevant due to the label ‘bisexual’ at the top of my profile.

I hate feeling like I have to tactically break the fact that I’m bisexual to a girl I’m talking to like its bad news or something. Or in one of my more self-conscious moments, feeling as if I don’t have as much right to be in a gay club as everyone else. Obviously it would be wrong of me to assume all gay people are presumptuous of bisexuals, many have no problem, but I do seem to get the vibe in other cases of ‘sleeping with the enemy’ and I’ve been told I was ‘sexually greedy’ (when in fact I’m bloody starving!).

Perhaps the growing trend of straight girls drunkenly pulling each other in front of lads in order to gain attention is to blame. If these girls are willing to go to these lengths to get people to look at them then fine, but just don’t lump me in with these attention-seeking hussies!

I think maybe the deterrent for some lesbians (not all) in going out with a bisexual is that they think that they might not take a gay relationship as seriously, possibly sleep with men behind their backs or even run off with one. But people in monosexual relationships can cheat and break up with their partners too and it’s not a trait exclusive to bisexual people. We can fall in love just like everyone else and are not incapable of being in a committed relationship. So next time you disregard someone on the basis of being bisexual, maybe stop and judge them on their individual personality not just preconceptions that come with a label.